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I recently started working as an intern at a firm in Birgunj, Nepal. Initially, I was excited to join and I didn’t have any difficulties making friends. But, at my new workplace, no one talks to me. It’s been months, and despite my efforts to communicate, my colleagues don’t engage with me and often give me extra work. I frequently feel isolated and burdened. I even have lunch alone. The enthusiasm I had when I first joined has completely faded. Now, I don’t feel like going to work and would rather stay in bed all day. Is there something wrong with me? How should I handle this?

Answered by Dr Rika Rijal, consultant psychiatrist

Firstly, it’s important to acknowledge that workplace challenges like isolation and heavy workloads can deeply affect our mental well-being. What you’re experiencing is more common than you might think, especially for fresh graduates entering a new professional environment. Many people feel the pressure to fit in, but if the environment remains unwelcoming or overly demanding, it can lead to feelings of loneliness and burnout.

This year’s World Mental Health Day theme—It’s time to prioritize mental health in the workplace—is a reminder that everyone, regardless of their position or level, has the right to mental well-being and a supportive environment. It’s crucial to prioritize your mental health. Consider having an honest conversation with your manager or HR about how you’re feeling. They may not be aware of the issues you’re facing. This could lead to some positive changes.

It’s okay to establish boundaries when it comes to workload. You shouldn’t feel burdened with excessive tasks that go beyond your capacity as an intern. Learning to say ‘no’ when necessary is important for your mental well-being. Try to connect with colleagues, even outside of work. Joining any social or interest groups within or outside the workplace could help foster new friendships. Reflect on what aspects of the job bring you joy or stress. If the overall environment doesn’t align with your values and well-being, it may be worth considering a change.

Before making any final decision about leaving, try to assess if things improve after communicating your concerns. However, if the workplace continues to negatively impact your mental health, it’s perfectly reasonable to look for a new opportunity where you feel valued and supported. Remember, prioritizing your mental health is not only your right but essential for overall success.

As Dashain is approaching I’m concerned about my parents, especially my mom. They start taking unnecessary pressure about getting ready to receive guests and perhaps impress them as well. It makes for a stressful environment at home. How can I ease the pressure and tell them to relax? 

Answered by Tashi Phunjo Gurung, counseling psychologist

Your concern shows what a caring and considerate child you are to your parents. It’s nice to see that your heart is in the right place, especially during festivals, which can be exciting and daunting at the same time.

It’s not uncommon to hear and see people take the pressure due to the expectation of hosting relatives and preparing a feast. It’s a huge thing to be responsible for and it can get stressful. The brunt of the work might, no doubt, fall on mothers, so it’s natural for them to feel responsible and ensure that everything goes perfectly. This certainly can get overwhelming.

Like any other tasks, the more we plan, the less pressure we might feel. We can involve them in planning for the tasks early, so that it doesn’t become pressurizing at the last minute. Breaking the tasks into smaller, manageable steps can be much easier. Moreover, you can always let them know that you can assist with the preparations, whether it’s cooking, cleaning or organizing. This would certainly ease a lot of their stress. 

It’s also important to align our expectations accordingly. We have to set boundaries about how much we can and can’t do. It’s okay to scale down the celebration or even simplify the feast. Dashain is more about the family, rather than the activities, and it’s certainly okay if things are not perfect. We can acknowledge their hard work, and let them know that it’s okay to relax and enjoy the festival too. Give them the reassurance that the focus is on spending time together, not impressing others. This can cause a shift in perspective to actually consider Dashain as a time for enjoyment.

Reminding ourselves and others that Dashain is about family, joy and togetherness, and not about perfection or impressing others can make a lot of difference. By planning ahead, offering support, and emphasizing quality time over elaborate preparations, we can help lessen the stress, and create a more enjoyable experience for everyone involved.

I’m 24, and lately, I’ve been feeling stuck. Every time I open Instagram or scroll through TikTok, I get hit by a wave of inadequacy. I see people my age, even younger, traveling, getting promotions, starting businesses, and I can’t help but feel like I’m falling behind. Logically, I know everyone’s just posting their best moments, but I still compare myself to them. Their lives look perfect, while mine feels ordinary. I keep asking myself, “Why not me?” and “What am I doing wrong?” I’ve tried cutting back on social media, but it’s hard to stop. It feels like I’m constantly competing and losing. What should I do?

Answered by Kapil Sharma, counseling psychologist at BETTER MIND

You’re not alone—many people are facing this challenge. Social media can also make things harder. The reasons for this could be many, but one major factor might be the comparison trap. In a comparison trap, there is an inner desire or drive to evaluate yourself against others. It’s natural to compare your abilities and achievements with others. But when you idealize someone or compare yourself to an unrealistic standard, this can create an inferiority complex.

The second one is the fear of missing out. This means feeling like others are living a more fulfilling life while you’re stuck. When your friends are traveling, posting photos, celebrating milestones, and you feel like you’re stuck in your routine, it leads to feelings of inadequacy.

I would suggest being intentional about who you follow and what you watch on social media. If certain accounts make you feel jealous or lead to unhealthy comparisons, consider muting or unfollowing them. Instead, follow accounts that promote self-acceptance and body positivity. You can also manage your social media notifications, setting specific times when you’ll use and avoid using social media. Use awareness apps to track your social media usage.

Be mindful of what you consume on social media and limit your screen time. If it’s not benefiting you, try other activities. For example, if you watch TikTok for 30 minutes and feel drained, note this in a journal. Then next time, decide on an alternative activity. This helps prepare you for future situations. For example, if you’re working on an assignment but feel the urge to check your phone, ask yourself why you feel helpless or why you aren’t focusing on your own progress.

Just being aware of these issues is a big step. You’ll start noticing what’s not working for you and where you need to make changes. Practicing gratitude can also help—focusing on small things that make you happy and being grateful for them. If social media affects your emotional health, take note of where you feel controlled or helpless.

Social media management is not just a technical issue, it’s an emotional regulation issue. If it were purely technical, everyone would experience the same feelings. But it’s not just about the tools, it’s about emotion management. Instead of seeking external validation, focus on internal fulfillment and personal growth. If you’re struggling to regulate your behavior and emotion regarding social media usage, consider talking to a therapist to guide you through it.

I have been feeling really depressed lately. I’m thinking a lot about my education, career, and future. To top things off, my relationship with my family isn’t that great either. How can I help myself from feeling unloved and stop over thinking? How can I start prioritizing myself first and maintain good relations with those around me?

Answered by Aditya Dangol, Psychosocial Counselor

First of all, I’m glad that you reached out and talked about what you’ve been going through. I’m unsure about your age but I assume that you are a young adult who is currently working as well as studying since you’ve mentioned career and education. It seems that you have multiple areas of your life that have been impacting you mentally and emotionally. It’s pretty natural for many young adults to stress about their future, especially while trying to juggle studies and career. It’s important for us to understand the root causes of these distressing thoughts and feelings.

For instance, much of the education and future stress stems from uncertainty. The uncertainty of finding a proper job with appropriate income, enough to sustain not only us but our families has been found to be the most prominent stressor. In the context of Nepal, the issue of scope and sustainability in a particular field causes much stress. There is additional stress when our desired choice of field doesn’t align with what our family expects from us.

Identifying the root cause of your career, education and future related stress can help you manage or even remove it. If it’s a case of lack of family support in your choice of career, it might be necessary to set boundaries and assertively communicate your desires, rather than avoid it due to fear of conflict. The same can be said for other issues with family members. Proper communication and asserting our boundaries can help us establish better relationships. A therapist might be able to help in identifying what boundaries have been encroached, how to set them, and assertively communicate your thoughts and emotions.

Each individual has his own way of experiencing and giving love. Some people show love by helping their loved ones and feel loved when their loved ones do the same. Not having a sense of reciprocation in this regard can cause people to feel unloved. A need to excessively show love to others can leave us feeling empty and unloved when they are not responded to with similar energy. It’s always healthy to communicate your feelings. If you feel hesitant and unsure, it’s nice to talk to someone you trust before you communicate. This might even help you improve and even nurture your relationships.

When we are able to communicate our feelings, whether they are generally positive such as love or excitement or happiness or negative feelings such as frustration, anger, hurt or disappointment, it allows us to feel a sense of self-prioritization. When we are able to communicate our boundaries assertively, it helps us boost our self-esteem and feeling of self-worth.

Learning and executing all of these things might be helpful but please understand that you don’t need to do it all by yourself. Seeking help in figuring the root causes of your issues and their solutions can help heal.